[ Suffice to say that Bruno has been doing a good deal of ruminating, himself - he's just better at looking like he isn't. In fact, he's been going about his daily routines just as before. If concealing one's struggles is a craft, then Bruno's nearly perfected it. Of course, he gives Abbacchio a wide berth out of respect. They haven't spoken since then, and that's fine, because Bruno doesn't get to decide if he's worthy of forgiveness.
Everything he did for his mission, he'd do again if he had the choice - it was a success, and it was the right thing to do, difficult as it was. If he'd hesitated to mourn the fallen, held back to keep the survivors safe, been honest about his condition, then they would never have been able to snatch victory away from Diavolo. Bruno believes all of this wholeheartedly. He also knows that he'd lied to his closest companions, sacrificed them for the cause, and left their bodies behind.
All of it is true. He's a pragmatic man; at the time and now, he thinks the justness of his cause made it worth it. At the same time, though, he cares - too much, he's heard over and over - and seeing the emotional fallout of his choices so clearly in Abbacchio has left him with guilt sitting heavy in his gut like a stone. There's no undoing what he'd done in Italy; there's no helping it if Abbacchio rejects him now. Abbacchio died because of him. In Ryslig, though, there's more uncertainty, and Bruno wonders if things would have turned out differently if he'd chosen his words better. If he'd been gentler, more apologetic. He's used to wearing his authority plainly, using it in concert with his confidence to lead others. Maybe he should have tried his heart, instead.
But there's no changing what's been said - there's only waiting for a response. Bruno knows it's Abbacchio even before he knocks, even without him saying anything, thanks to his new nose. Opening the door, Bruno looks as put-together as ever, aside from the tired eyes and sloppy braid, both of which he sports almost every day in Ryslig now. Abbacchio looks exhausted -- but Bruno's seen him looking worse. It's a relief to see him at all, if he's being frank, and that's what shows in his eyes, not nerves. ]
Abbacchio, [ he says, quiet but cordial, eyes searching the other man's expression. ] What do you need?
no subject
Everything he did for his mission, he'd do again if he had the choice - it was a success, and it was the right thing to do, difficult as it was. If he'd hesitated to mourn the fallen, held back to keep the survivors safe, been honest about his condition, then they would never have been able to snatch victory away from Diavolo. Bruno believes all of this wholeheartedly. He also knows that he'd lied to his closest companions, sacrificed them for the cause, and left their bodies behind.
All of it is true. He's a pragmatic man; at the time and now, he thinks the justness of his cause made it worth it. At the same time, though, he cares - too much, he's heard over and over - and seeing the emotional fallout of his choices so clearly in Abbacchio has left him with guilt sitting heavy in his gut like a stone. There's no undoing what he'd done in Italy; there's no helping it if Abbacchio rejects him now. Abbacchio died because of him. In Ryslig, though, there's more uncertainty, and Bruno wonders if things would have turned out differently if he'd chosen his words better. If he'd been gentler, more apologetic. He's used to wearing his authority plainly, using it in concert with his confidence to lead others. Maybe he should have tried his heart, instead.
But there's no changing what's been said - there's only waiting for a response. Bruno knows it's Abbacchio even before he knocks, even without him saying anything, thanks to his new nose. Opening the door, Bruno looks as put-together as ever, aside from the tired eyes and sloppy braid, both of which he sports almost every day in Ryslig now. Abbacchio looks exhausted -- but Bruno's seen him looking worse. It's a relief to see him at all, if he's being frank, and that's what shows in his eyes, not nerves. ]
Abbacchio, [ he says, quiet but cordial, eyes searching the other man's expression. ] What do you need?